Woah! There's a creature in there!

So you might have heard I'm working on a science experiment at the moment.  It's in my uterus (giggle giggle, yes I'm a third grader) and it's been an interesting experiment so far.

We spent the first 14 weeks or so just hoping the little creature would hold on tight and survive life in the "roll cage" as we have been affectionately been referring to my belly.  There's not really much else to do in the first trimester but worry.  You can't feel anything, can't see much on a sonogram except a heartbeat, if you're lucky, and it's really easy for the anxiety to compound.

When we hit the 2nd trimester and saw our little froggy leaping around like crazy, it started to sink in a bit more.  I was now about 60% sure we were going to have a baby.  Which led to excitement over cute outfits and massive amounts of research about things you don't ever think about until a baby comes into your realm of possibility.  Strollers and carseats, breast pumps and bottles.  There are about 17 million baby items for sale in the world, and most books, magazines and stores are very good at convincing you that you need at least 16 million of them.  Luckily for us, the fact that anything we buy in the states has to be "imported" in our suitcases, we've managed to focus on the basic necessities so far.

I'm now at about 19 weeks.  We even know that our budding babe has a wee willy in there. But now it's a holding pattern.  The roll cage is expanding daily, I can literally see and feel myself becoming more pregnant every time I look in the mirror.  But I still can't feel any movement.  And that's what I want more than anything else. So of course, there's still the twinge of fear.

I know, I know, we always want more right!  It's never enough!  As soon as I do feel him move, I'll probably start complaining about how he's keeping me up at night.  (Insert irony here)

So I'm trying to relax, focus on the positive and remember how exciting it is that Ryan and I created a new life, albeit a slightly evil looking one at the moment.  Though to be fair, I think most babies probably look like Voldemort when they don't have any body fat yet.  Don't worry, we'll still love him even if he becomes a dark lord of magic.  Cuz he's our baby boy.